N-Zilla's Mom needs a Tissue, a Hug, and a Nap

Today the N-Zilla had a doctors appointment. Where I proceeded to cry to the doctor.  I don't know what came over me. I told the doctor it was just because I was tired (N-Zilla's up right now and being very destructive, he doesn't want to go to bed and it is midnight).  I really am just so tired.  I was surprised that that as soon as I opened my mouth, tears came out of my eyes.  I kept on saying I'm just tired.  And I feel like I am alone again.  I don't know what Mr. S feels about all of this.  Sometimes I get the impression  that he is on board with our Sensational N-Zilla and other times he is just at his wits end.

So any way as I was crying at the doctors office, I found out that we are on the right track.  Doctor suggested that I try a night time schedule, something similar to our morning one. Maybe that will help with his sleep.  If not we can try Melatonin.  Geesh I was crying so much I think I might need to make a doc appointment for myself.  That or more frequent trips to the gym.  Maybe the snide remark made by S.I.L was right, maybe I do need counseling. 

I felt good that N-Zilla has such a caring Pediatrician, but walking out of the doctors office I felt embarrassed for crying.  Good Lord, am I that pent up for emotional release that I cry to the first Doctor I see..which by the way was an M.D not a counselor.

Rest of our trip Down Town (San Antonio) went good.  N-Zilla my loveable and destructive boy walked along the River Walk quacking at ducks and trying to jump in the street.  Luckily I had the harness on.  The only awkward thing about that was N-Zilla likes to drop to the ground and crawl or just lay on the cement...so it looked like I was walking my boy on a leash.  I'm kinda use to the stairs and remarks people make when I have the harness on, but safety first.  

As the trip came to the end I felt more and more embarrassed of my tears and more at peace that I am doing exactly what the N-Zilla needs to thrive as his loveable and destructive self.