Thursday, June 30, 2011

Happy Birthday to My Sensational N-Zilla!

July 2nd 2008 My Sensational Loveable and Destructive N-Zilla came into this world. The labor hurt like hell but was happy to share it with the Bestie, Mr. S, and M.I.L. 

Three years later my N-Zilla is keeping us on our toes!

Happy 3rd Bday N-Zilla.....rwarrrrrr!

right out the womb

1 year old
2 years old
right around the corner to being 3 years old

Monday, June 27, 2011

New and Big Things are happening in the world of N-Zilla

N-Zilla is turning 3 this weekend!  Lots of things are changing and big things are happening.  This is a exciting and scarey time.  Obviously because new things and events are coming our way...it's exciting.  However, with new things come new routines, first times, and mini break downs. From either me or N-Zilla :D   Since I've started this blog and tried to educate myself as much as I can about Autism and SPD, I don't feel as unsure and blind when dealing with new things (related to N-Zilla or SPD).

             NEW THINGS

1. Huge thing...no more ECI.  I am bummed about that.  I will diffidently miss our visits.  I know N-Zilla will miss Flora the most (if your reading this... it's the one with the blond hair).  I got a little teary eyed durning the very last visit with Flora.  N-Zilla seems the most attached and affectionate with her.  It hurt because he has no idea he will never see her again.  I am thankful that she was a part of his life.  I will take the 10 months that ECI was in our lives.

2. N-Zilla is turning 3 this weekend.  We've decided to take him to Morgans Wonderland.  You should really look it up...It's awesome.  All four of my kids love this place.  Contemplating inviting the IL's to join us, so they can see N-Zilla in his element. Still undecided about that one.  I can't believe that N-Zilla my Loveable and Destructive boy is going to be 3!

3.  Real play.  Real play is number 3 on the New Things list.  I got this phrase from Toy Story 3.  It's also on a shirt that N-Zilla has.  I know what your thinking...big whoop, the boy plays with toys, but it is a BIG WHOOP.  A couple months ago I posted that N-Zilla did pretend play for the first time.  Something I didn't pay much attention to with my older children...because they just did.  N-Zilla however had been stuck in this loop of trains and Thomas for months.  He had repeated the same scene for over 6 months. "Stop Thomas". "Oh no it's stuck".  "No". "Oh no."  "Help me". "Help me Thomas". Followed by a crashing sound.  He set up all his toys to match this exact scene. If you have NetFlix look up Thomas and Misty Island, when you see the scene where one of the trains drops the Jobi wood you'll see our ground hogs day moment.  Every now and again he would shout, "Thomas and Friends".  Now I see him playing pretend with leggo's.  He plays with stuffed animals and pretend they are babies.  N-Zilla also pretends to cook and feed me.  Of course he just wouldn't be N-Zilla if he didn't play with trains, but now he say's, "All fired up and ready to go".  Things are changing and it's good.

4.  In August N-Zilla will go to Pre-K! This is very new and big news.  I'm not sure if I went over the A.R.D Meeting that decided this?  Our little N-Zilla will be going to school on a bus.  I'm apprehensive about the bus.  N-Zilla loves car rides, but I don't trust any one. How will I know he will be safe with the driver.  It scares me because N-Zilla does not have the verbal skills (yet) to tell me if something is wrong.  I just kinda pick up the clues at home when it comes N-Zilla.  I know when he is hungry, tired, or  in a bad mood.  I can also pick up on his anxiety when we are in public.  What if someone hurts him and he can't tell me.  I know...helicopter mother right?  Not really.  Remember this is new to me too.  For the (very) most part.  Pre-K is a good thing.  He will split his time with a special ed and general ed class room.  In addition to that he will go to speech therapy four times a week for 30min.  I'm sure at first N-Zilla will be overwhelmed, but this time he will be at a school that won't give up on him. 

Things that might always stay the same:

1. N-Zilla's rrrrrrreeeeeepppppeeeeetttttiiiiiiiittttttiiiiiiiivvvvvvvveeeeeeennnnnneeeeesssssssss. 
2. His ability to be Loveable and Destructive.
3. His obsession with trains.
4. The dislike for touching paint.

So...within the next two months I will have a 3 year old in Pre K and a 11year old in middle school.  Our world is changing and I am excited.

Saturday, June 11, 2011

It's midnight and I feel like crying.

Now that I have a moment from the constant crying and repeated request for "The Cuppy", I'm gonna blog to my little heats content.

See right now I'm a bit delirious.  I have been up since Midnight.  N-Zilla has been on the war/cry path and it is taking a toll on me.  I blame my self.  I have been so wrapped up soaking every piece of  summer with Son #1 and Crazy Horse that I have not been as punctual with N-Zilla's sensory diets.   They are leaving next week to spend part of the summer with their father in Vegas.  Son #1 will be spending his birthday there.  As he will every summer until he is 18.  Yet another horse pill to swallow.  By the time they come back home in August it's time to for school shopping, doctors/eye appointments and any thing else we have to do to get ready for the school year.  I do not want to alienate my other kids because I have to put so much attention to N-Zilla.  In all seriousness things get pretty fucken messy if I don't. I realize that all this ranting and raving should be on 30onmom, BUT my feeling right now has a lot to do with N-Zilla.  Not him as a person, just his reactions to things and my reactions to his reactions.

Meanwhile, N-Zilla is freaking out when ever someone touches his damn Thomas Trains.  Saying,"No" to everything.  On the other hand, he is talking more and more every day.  Even at one of his last ECI sessions Flora, Fauna and Merryweather said he was talking great and making good eye contact.  He even played with play dough.  That has been 7 month long goal and he is doing it!  Then he has nights like the past few nights.  Staying up until 6 am falling asleep for an hour, then ready for the day.  Last night was especially hard for me.  I'm sure him too.  Who likes to cry for hours on end.  It started in our bed when he was making the famous moose calls.  I don't know why I didn't rub his back or squeeze his arms.   It's been such a long time since I've had to do that.  I guess I just forgot.  Mr. S grumbled something and yelled for N-Zilla to go to sleep.  I feel his frustration; however, the mama bear doesn't like when N-Zilla is being yelled at in the middle of the night to stop something he can't help.  So me and N-Zilla went to the living room where nothing would satisfy him.  He cried through all the Thomas movies and through Toy Story 3.  He took a power nap at about 5 something and by 6am he was up crying. AGAIN!  I've lost all sense of my training.  I did not use any of his sensory diet to help him calm down.  I just sat next to him and excepted his crying.  I'm exhausted, delirious, overwhelmed and have tons of laundry to do.   I actually had more that I was writing but guess who is crying for milk right now and not to mention the older ones are hovering over my shoulder waiting like sharks for the computer.    Hopefully we can be like the Sleeping House and all take a nap by 12.