Thursday, August 18, 2011

If it's not N-Zilla keeping me up, it's anxiety.

I am probably more nervous for N-Zilla to start Pre-K then he is.  I have talked about school and tried to prepare him. I just don't know how much he can comprehend.   I'm actually losing sleep over it. 

Last night I had nightmares about waking up to late and getting N-Zilla to the bus stop on time.  And, how the bus got stuck in traffic in a rain storm.  Ya, I know I am being ridiculous.  But, how does this happen?  I know that one day he was going to go to school.  I was Actually counting down the days.  It's just that one day I was miserable and tired with sore nipples from nursing him 24/7, then the next day I was at a ARD meeting trying to make sense of it all and now next Monday he is going to Pre-K.

My world is changing and I better learn how to appreciate it, who knows what the future holds for N-Zilla and our family.

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Update on the N-Zilla.

Update  on the N-Zilla:

One bottle of nail polish was broken.

First time vomited on dad when taking medicine.

Manage to break every single set blinds in the house.  (dad is pist)

New favorite movie, Tangled.

Has been sleeping peacefully with Melatonin for almost a month now.

Finally learned to name the parts of the face.

Wrote on the computer screen. (mom fixed it)

Dropped the Wii

Broke new drinking glass.

AND... Is going to school on Monday.

Go N-Zilla! Please don't break anything.

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Freakout mode and judgmental situations?

Last weekend was a little bit of a rocky one...if you remember our trip to Wal-Mart and getting kicked out of a restaurant. 

Here we are a brand new week and weekend to talk about.  Overall things have been going pretty good, and yet it sorta feels like we have taken a few steps back with progress.  We are back to knocking everything over. But his attention span and comprehensions skills have really blossomed.  N-Zilla seems really comfortable at home, and is talking bunches more.  As far as being in public...well it's a work in progress.  If it's not a comfort zone it can get a little tricky.  Like the time N-Zilla almost made a waitress pee at a Chinese Buffet, or his Birthday freak out at Red Robbins. 

It seems normal to us now or at least me.  Every public outing I find new ways to "be".  Bring the weighted blanket, bring the PSP, bring the snacks, and know the cue to call it a day and head home.  If I really think about it, it's not to much different then what I did with Son #1 and Crazy Horse, and now with The baby.  It's just a little bit more intense.

N-Zilla my loveable and former insomniac is now taking Melatonin.  Huge milestone for our family.  Every body is getting almost the recommended amount of sleep.  Which has put a writers block on my blogging, seeing how I usually blog while up in the wee hours with N-Zilla.  Mr. S and I are still getting use to ALL the kids asleep at the same time.  Sometimes we just stair at each other and say well I guess we are going to bed.  

This past Sunday I decided to take N-Zilla to church with me.  I've decided that I will not be a prisoner of what ever it is that my son has.  And neither will he.  Baby steps of course, only he and I went.  I left the sleeping pre-teens in there stinky rooms and The Baby and Mr. S to watch TLC.

Weighted blanket...check, favorite toy...check, cell phone off...check.  I walked into mass confident.  I sat in the front with the rest of the grown-ups and well behaved children.  It was good.  I didn't really hear what the homely was because N-Zilla was fidgety, and a few times he had to wrap his blanket around him.  However, it was one of my favorite times in church that I have had in a very long time.  N-Zilla looked around at the stain glass windows and whispered very loudly, "ooooo, cooool".  When it was time to sing N-Zilla sang about Thomas and Lighting McQueen.  Had to give him the death grip when receiving communion, he almost ran "on stage" as Crazy Horse likes to call it. 

I left Mass as confident and cool as I entered.  I didn't even break a sweat.  N-Zill walked out the church wearing his blanket as a cape and we drove home. Happy.

So why do I put my self and the N-Zilla in potentially freakout mode and judgmental situations?   Because...why not.  I'm never not going to have a bad day with any of my kids.  Why avoid having any kinda day at all with my N-Zilla. 

Thursday, August 4, 2011

This one time at China Moon

My Lovable and Destructive 3 year old affectionately known as N-Zilla has been a lovable and destructive pain in the ass.  Being stuck at home with a broken air conditioner isn't helping the situation either.

"Pain in the ass" might be a little harsh but it's Thursday, my air conditoner is STILL broken, and I truly am tired of cleaning pee accidents.  (To be honest N-Zilla isn't close to being potty trained.  I try and try, only to hear I pooped and see pee running down his leg.)

Last weekend I took ALL OF THE KIDS to the store with me. Wal-Mart of all places.  Why? Cause I didn't take N-Zilla with me to church.  I didn't want to sit in the cry room.  I wanted to sit in a actual pew.  I took the three kids which in short is every one except N-Zilla.  During Mass I was feeling guilty for not bringing N-Zilla and leaving him and Mr. S to watch reruns of Phineas and Ferb.  So I did what any normal guilt ridden mother would do...I committed errand suicide.

After Mass I picked the boy up giving Mr. S a break and went to the worst evil necessity that is Wal-Mart.  Our trip consisted of  N-Zilla yelling mom the whole time we where there.  Not to get my attention but just to say it.  A lady looked at me and said, "Oh My God" out loud rolled her eyes and trotted to some other isle. 

It's about this time that The Baby starts to cry.  I can't hold her I am on a mission. 

While on this mission, N-Zilla decides to knock things off the shelves.  I had to pry the hangers from his hands.  Some one said wow what a handful.  NO FUCKING SHIT.  Excuse my language.  I usually like to save my bad manners for my other blog, but I felt like yelling that.

Somewhere between the screaming and hangers I ended up at the register buying a gallon of milk and a Monster energy drink which I call a Momster.  Crazy Horse gets a kick out of it.   I had decided there is no way I am making dinner tonight.  I had a brilliant idea to take the family to dinner.  After all I have been doing so good with the finical fasting I had a few pennies from the week to spare.

Dinner time rolled around. Off to China Moon we went (that's our  favorite Chinese restaurant).  As soon we got our drinks N-Zilla my Loveable and Destructive dinner date threw a fork across the table and luckily landed on the floor.  The owner was very vocal and animated when telling us that that was dangerous and "oh he break glass" and pointing to where we should sit at.  Granted besides us there where only three other parties there but ALL EYE'S ON US. 

 Now, I'm kinda use to this.  As you can tell I get that kind of attention at Wal-Mart.  However, Son #1 and Crazy Horse haven't directly experienced being zeroed out. Neither has Mr. S.  As a family we all had the finger pointed at us.  My husband just lowered his head.  My first reaction was to storm out...but then I remembered how much I loved their food.

That's when micro-managing mama started to work.

"Waitress make our order to go".
"Mr. S take N-Zilla to the Car".
-Pause a minute-
"Son # 1 take The Baby to the Car"
"Crazy Horse help me put the drinks in the to go cups"

"Lady next time you wanna say something please come to the table and not yell across the room, you embarrassed us.  Our son has a special need and I would love to eat somewhere that doesn't have a indoor play ground next to it and get my dinner off of trays" ( I didn't really say that but I did talk to the owner who almost gave birth to kittens when the fork hit the floor).

We ended up eating our dinner out of to-go boxes at a park.  Just another day I guess for me, but I can see it was hard for Mr. S.

Our reality right now is we might just have to order to go from now on and make an effort to take the older kids to eat by themselves and set time aside to go out by our self (me and Mr. S). 

Now if I can just find a baby sitter for N-Zilla.