A little break down and Shades of Gray

A little break down on N-Zilla...Loveable and Destructive.

About six months after N-Zilla  was born I went to my Doctor for P.P.D .  As an infant he was colicky more so then my other children but a little like Crazy Horse (9 year old Daughter).  As a younger toddler lots of things were getting broken or eaten in my house.  Lots and Lots of sleepless nights.  Tried to do the same activities I did with the older two with him, but he didn't like touching paint.  So no weekly fridge paintings.  N-Zilla was a bit more Va-Voom as Grandma Big Bear likes to say or Alie Oop Like Grandpa Big Bear likes to say. I never gave to much thought to it because for the most part little N-Zilla was overall a happy baby.


N-Zilla takes a little assessment .  Comes to our attention that N-Zilla isn't speaking as much as he's suppose to.  August 2010 N-Zilla begains Eci. Notice that N-Zilla likes trains obsessively.  Repeats words and has certain characteristics of Sensory Processing Disorder.   Flora, Fauna, and Merryweather come to the house 4 times a week.  Once for speech, once for reinforcement of speech session and interactive, and twice for behavior and parent education (how to work with your spd child and to be honest I feel that I work well with N-Zilla and I have my SPD tools, but it's nice to have someone to talk to and who isn't fazed by a kid hanging at my neck and ramming me with his head in my gut).  We just keep on talking.  It's always nice to have adult contact).


(Start a blog(s) if nothing else it would make me feel better and get some confusion of my chest and help myself, family, and friends understand N-Zilla, although I want to make it clear N-Zilla is so much more the SPD.  It isn't who he is it's just a part of our life).


  At first the blog(s) kinda made some waves with in-laws, but by making my blog(s) I was able to find lot of helpful, useful, and funny resources.  Like the  SPD Blogger Network and SPD foundation, and many other blogs of families that have sensational kids and find humor in their life.  Before this I would have never thought to search Sensory Processing Disorder on Face Book.


Getting ready to transition out of Eci and to possible pre-school.  I fill out all the paper work and set a date with the school district to see if N-Zilla qualifies for pre-school or speech therapy at the least through the school district.


(mean while Mr. S and I haven't really talked about SPD.  I sense that it makes him feel uncomfortable which makes me annoyed.  I feel more and more alienated because I know that my Loveable and Destructive son needs just a little bit more of a push.  I can't put my finger on it, But often it makes me feel helpless, confused and frustrated). 


Went to the (first) speech assessment at the school district.  I thought it went good and I was almost positive that he wasn't gong to qualify for speech therapy and preschool.  Later that week I got a phone call from Mrs. Coker saying, "Could you bring N-Zilla in, I have some concerns and would like to rule out Autism".  Wow I didn't see that coming.  Brought it up to Mr. S and it didn't go to well.


Went to second assessment.  Again I thought it went good.  It seemed all very normal to me.  A week later got a phone call to go over the points.  I'll give you the very brief answer as I was on the phone for an hour with Mr. Wagner about the results.


It seems that N-Zilla is in a gray area or Possible or At Risk.  I heard those last two phrase a lot.  He got a 88 out of 100 in the Autistic scale so that puts him at Possible for a learning disability.  I strongly feel that it is SPD.    Looks like N-Zilla will be going to preschool (I will find out next Thursday which by the way will be the first time Mr. S will be taking the little ones to the Doctors all by himself), and every year we will have a ARD about the N-Zilla.  By his 6 birthday we will have a meeting to see if he needs to continue special education or with general education.  Phew that was lot to stay.  I'm sure I'm leaving some things out, but will make for a better post later. 


Went over results with Mr. S again didn't go so well.  It really does seem that he doesn't want to know what is going on.  But I need him to be on board here.  Especially when it come to our Sensory Diet.  Even though we talked about it I don't think Mr. S is fully accepting everything that is going on.  


As funny as it sounds...I feel like we have a game plan, and that makes me feel so much better.

This Wednesday night.

It's getting a little tricky right now.  I have a ARD meeting with the school district plus potential school and teacher and special ed teacher.  Every time I get an answer or something like it, I get more questions.  I talked to Flora of my Flora, Fauna, and Marryweather today, and she tried to break it down.  While her visit to our house, N-Zilla pooped his pants and Mr. S had to give him a bath and N-Zilla took a head dive off of our kitchen table.  Now I have the elephant man sleeping on my bed. To top it off for today, I feel like I am not spending enough time with the other three children. Aww poop. I need some ice cream.

Previous post from N-Zilla.

                                  Here are some post from earlier N-Zilla Loveable and Destructive.

N-Zilla Loveable and Destructive

He only acts this way because of you

Night time sensory diet.

Night time sensory diet.

It was getting a little hectic here with all the lack of sleep that was going on.  So for the past three weeks I have been fine tuning a Night time sensory diet.  Most nights it works, some nights it doesn't but it is a whole lot better then being Sleepless in San Antonio.

Night Time Sensory Diet:
(not every night things are done in the same order)

1. Walk around our neighborhood. 

Try walk for 20 minutes.  This is a good opportunity to work on his vocab and speech. Some days he doesn't talk, he just makes train and car sounds. He is getting pretty creative with the sounds.  Airplanes sounds have been added to the family.

2. Dinner time.
Dinner time is either before or after the walk.  It really does depend on every one else schedule.

3.Occupational Time.
I'm trying to incorporate the whole family in this.  I am desperately trying not to make my other children feel like they are being left out.  N-Zilla does some jumping jacks and dancing with Son #1 and Crazy Horse, followed by moving heavy objects.  This is the scariest part of OT.  I twisted my ankle last week chasing N-Zilla. He was running towards the street.  Also during this episode I feel down and bruised my palm.  Plus, I got a black eye a while back when N-Zilla threw his head back.  Despite all that I venture on with the weights.  Some where in the near future I will have to purchase weighted medicine balls. 

I have N-Zilla fill his toys in a basket and lift them as high (and safely) as he can.  We end with a blanket roll or the Burrito.  I roll him up in a blanket and I pat his body or drag him in the blanket until he gets undone.   All the kids love this.

4. Bath time.  
I usually clean two birds with one bath.  The Baby and N-Zilla take a bath while Crazy Horse and Son #1 get to hang out with dad with out the little ones butting in. 

5. Bed time.
Put The Baby down with her bottle. Crazy Horse and Son# 1 take shower so they go straight to bed (most nights without a fight). N-Zilla gets his sippy cup lays on my bed.  All the lights off, except the light form the computer.  Play song Air Plane by Local Natives. Over and Over again until he falls asleep.

So far works like a charm and he hasn't gotten up destructive.

This picture is not worth my thousand words.

This was suppose to represent my sensational day today...toys (mostly Thomas the Train)...it's caotic for me, but some how it just looks like a cute blanket pattern or wall paper.  :/  My art is not portraying my feelings but not to shabby for a novice.

Can I get paid for doing our own O/T?

N-Zilla had his assessment today.  I never know what to do during these things.  I just sat their and tried not to pay to much attention.  At one point he was playing with a baby doll.  It was the cutest thing.  Two reasons; this is the second time I have seen him do Pretend play and while he pushed the doll in the stroller he told me "eeewwwweee, the baby pooped". How could I not laugh out loud.

I don't know what is going to happen from here.  I'm trying to take matters in my own hands.  This past week or so, we have started a new night time routine with N-Zilla.  Something does need to change thought because as you read in And the list goes on, The loveable and destructive Zilla has taken hostage of my house again. 

Tonight we did some occupational therapy of our own at home.  Some jumping jacks, catch, and lifting a weight.  I was a little scared of that one. In the past two weeks I have bruised my palm and ankle, threw my leg out, and looked like a dork because I fell down chasing N-Zilla outside trying to catch him before he went into the street.  And of course the shiner. 

We also used a heavy blanket to roll N-Zilla in.  He seems to really like that one.  We ended with sitting in the tent (blanket hanging over couch).  It seems good so far. 

Tomorrow I will be starting a new morning OT routine.  I'm gonna have to become more structured for this on.  Keep you all posted on how it goes and if it is working for us.

And the List Goes on!

1. Wake up in a SENSATIONAL MOOD, and kick mom out of the bed.

2. Decided that tortilla dipped in salsa is good for breakfast.

3. Drop and break the pretty pink nail polish that looks good on Mom and calms The baby down.

4. Rub cut up oranges on the coffee table, hair and face.

5. While mom is in the bathroom drink powdered creamer.

6. Mom makes me run outside moving rocks and I like it!

7. Have a melt down @ speech.

8. Want Occupational therapy during Moms session.

9. Have another melt down for a sippy cup.

10. Knock neatly stacked books on floor.

11. Calm down with some Just Dance.

we will see what else makes this list today...it's only 2 in the afternoon.

N-ZILLA WAS HERE!

Where was I...Oh yeah; Black eye, School District, and Moon Sand

It is now 6:13pm and I think we left of somewhere around 12 or 1.  I can't be sure.  The house is silent except for the sound of my playlist The Baby crawling around.  N-Zilla is actually asleep, the T.V is off, Crazy Horse is at her friends, Mr. S and Son #1 are at Base ball practice.

I will totally take advantage of this time to blog, shower and watch reality T.V.

As many blogs that have been neglected for a while, I will start off with...I've been busy...lots have happened etc...etc...etc.

First off I recently realized at N-Zilla's last speech session that the next one will be his last.  He will be turning three in July.  No more ECI for him. No more Flora, Fauna, and Merry-weather (The names are from Disneyland Sleeping Beauty. The three fairy's that helped Princess Aurora's parents in their time of need.  That's how I see these ladies).  I got a little sad when "Flora" looked through her calender to schedule for next month.  This year has gone by to fast.  I'm not ready to let go of my training wheels that give me the courage and reassurance.  And most of all some balance I need.

This particular day didn't go so well.  Mostly Flora and I talked because I double booked yet again (unknowingly).  Earlier that day N-Zilla had his (2nd) assessment with the school district.  I was pretty optimistic.  N-Zilla is speaking more word and saying them clear.  I was sure they were going to say, "N-Zilla's mom, your boy does not need early pre-school because he is a talking genius"!, "You really did jump the gun putting him in ECI, no you and N-Zilla go and enjoy the rest of your week".   N-Zilla even walked into the building confident.  He walked down the hall talking all sorts of jargon.  This letting me know he felt comfortable.

During the assessment I sat at the "parent" table.  I did good.  I totally paid no attention to N-Zilla and the Speech Pathologist.  I pulled out my phone logged on to the Daily Beast and Babble.  Caught up on some reading and emails.  But then the questions started. "Would you say he likes Thomas the Train or is he obsessed"?   "Is his behavior similar or different then your other children" ?  Great, why can't any specialist just give me a definite answer so I know what to do for my boy.  Honestly, I thought he did great.

At the end, the Speech Pathologist told me that she would add up the scores then give me a call.  Well, I got a call.  This time from another specialist.  Honestly, I don't know what type..she told me but I can't remember . (Oh if your wondering if the house is still quite...no.  It lasted about 30 minutes.  N-Zilla fell of the couch and has been crying for about 30 minutes for Thomas.  The baby is asleep and the girls are playing Just Dance).  She ended the conversation telling me that there were some concerns she had, and she wanted to rule out Autism.  Those words...that label.  How was I suppose to feel.

When your pregnant you dread to hear D word.  Down Syndrome. And after the baby is born you dread to hear the A word. Autistic.   I didn't feel either way when making the appointment for his assessment.  Hopefully this will be his last with the school district.  Shortly after getting off the phone my mind went racing.  What do you mean you have some concerns?  Didn't he answer your questions to the best of his 2 year old degree.  Didn't he interact with you how he is suppose to? Didn't he...?  I have gut feeling that his SPD had gotten the best of him that day.  What ever that means.  I kept on saying that he was two, and I was reminded that he would be turning three very shortly.  I called Mr. S to give him the 411.  I wish I hadn't.  It just upset him.  He said that their was nothing wrong with him.  I don't even think N-Zilla has Autism but I found myself defending Autistic Human Beings every where, "And so what if he is, their is nothing WRONG with that".  "People that have Autism are not wrong...he isn't broken".  We were having an argument before their was even papers signed for an assessment.  I had to end the conversation saying that well we are just ruling it out. Lets not jump to conclusions.    This was Wednesday.  He had the Speech assessment Monday.

Thursday Night I was whacked something awful by my N-Zilla.  We have been doing a new night time routine with him to get him to bed before the sun comes up for the new day.  So far it has been working. We are still in the trial run.  I will post our routine later.

Thursday night was a little rough but nothing too bad.  N-Zilla and I were taking pictures on my phone.  It was soothing to him, but the right went all wrong in seconds.  I wish I could show you a happy picture of us moments before I got a black eye, but I am trying to keep like Clark Kent.

N-Zilla my loveable and destructive 2 soon to be 3 year old yelled no, threw his head back and hit the brow of my eye.  Holy Moly, I saw stars.  I'm sure this is how it feels to be kicked in the testicles.  Not as bad as child birth but pretty painful.  I got nauseous, my jaw locked and I curled up in a ball.  Now I have been hit in my life time...but never like that.  The only thing that comes close to the hypothetical kick to the balls is being hit in the nose.   Now the only thing I have to worry about is when I go to Crazy Horse's game tomorrow, that I look like a battered women. 

Now to today.  Friday...MOON SAND.  This has been awesome for N-Zilla.  However, as loveable as he his he got a bit destructive with sand.  I didn't do our routine this morning.  I was a bad mommy.  I put on NetFlix for him so I could clean the house.

After putting a load of laundry in and putting the folded clothes in the kids room, I came around the corner to pink moon sand on the floor of N-Zilla's play area which also is The Baby's play area and family room AND is right next to the kitchen and my bed room door.  Phew, that was a lot of "ands".  I had to completely stop everything that I was doing.  The Baby wanted to be held and if I wasn't paying attention to the boy he would dump all the toys on the floor.  I should have saw it coming.  This morning he threw his plate of eggs on the floor then wrapped himself in his blanket.

So I put on 16 and Pregnant and things eventually calmed down.

Moon Sand every where, And production has stopped!

Production has ceased right now... Actually, this production of writing on this blog will have to cease as well for the moment, as I can smell the pungent smell of N-Zilla's BM.  For those of you who don't know...It's his poop.  Here is the 100th mention of "I can't wait til he is completely potty trained".  So I will have to follow up and fill you in later if The Baby and N-Zilla grace me by taking a nap at the same time.  In future blog post you all will find out why I have a black eye, why there is moon sand every where, and why I got a phone call from the school district.

 Oooooo exciting!

soon.

I get my computer back Wednesday. I'm making this post by blackberry...wanted to check in and say I miss you blog world.