To light or not to light my house blue....that is the question

April is Autism awareness month.  I'm having a lot of mixed emotions.  I read a lot of things like "Cure for Autism".  I don't know if I will be participating in any walks or fundraisers.  I don't know yet if I am going to light my house blue.  Maybe I'm having conflicted emotions because our situation is not like other families situation.  Like the saying goes...If you met one person with Autism then you've meet one person with Autism. We are all different.

First...N-Zilla is so young, he has SPD.   As of right now is going to Pre-K for the Autism Spectrum.  Or rather Non-Categorical Autism.  He has defiantly gotten early intervention.  N-Zilla has shown all the signs of ASD milestones (or missed the milestones).

 Things get difficult.  Going to restaurants are a little bit  more of a production then we would like.   Days get long when N-Zilla can not communicate what he wants or is feeling.  Money gets tight having to buy Pull-Ups and the same two toys over and over again.  I get frustrated when my house becomes destroyed, and Mrs. S and I become loopy when we don't get enough sleep.  Don't even get me started on the repetition. (Obvioulsy these are just the tip of the ice berg.  But I don't have all day to go down the list)

But that is who our child is.  I don't see anything in N-Zilla that needs to be cured.  If you take away his obsessions with trains and his accomplishments over his hurtles (thus far) then you take away him.  You can not have N-Zilla without the good the bad and the compulsive.  He just wouldn't be himself.

  I love my N-Zilla.  I love all his little ticks and sayings.  I find it adorable that he likes to talk about himself in the third person.   I am a proud parent when N-Zilla has figured something out or hits a milestone...knowing that he learns things in a different way and when he gets it, it's so beautiful.

I am in no means an expert on ASD.  I am only an expert on my children (and even that gets confusing).  I think that calling it Autism Awareness Month is a good  name.  So we can all be aware.  I'm just not sure that I like the phrase "Cure for Autism".