Part 2. My Loveable and Destructive son is not a spectrum test

Levels of N-Zilla

So here we are weeks later and I am barely getting to part 2 of the last post I had. 

Any who...  I think where I left off, I was going to tell you that I had to explain to the nurse that N-Zilla is on the spectrum.  That is where the testing began.

When listening to his heart she brought her forehead real close to his.  No...not real close. Touching.  As far as I know I don't "have anything", and I don't like people getting that close to me.

N-Zilla looked at me then at her.

"Oh no, he's fine.  He is not that much on the spectrum.  He let me go in his comfort zone".

What the hell.

Then she started to randomly clap.  I'm assuming to see if the sudden annoying noise will "set him off".

This made me upset.  What the hell difference does it make what part of the spectrum if any he is on?

N-Zilla isn't a walking test.  He isn't a poster child for spectrum.  I've spent the past year not doing things to "set him off", and working with him to go past his comfort zone.

It was not medically necessary to do these things.  It was just for comparison.  Her friend had a son that...and so on and so on.

What if these things had made him uncomfortable to the point of no return.  Then what?

It made me upset, sad, and angry.  I couldn't help my Lovable and Destructive son verbalize why his hand was close shut for 4 or more hours.  I couldn't verbalize for him that no matter if he had a eye growing out of his forehead he still wouldn't like a perfect strangers forehead to touch his.

He is a person.  Not a test.  He is not SPD.  He is not AS or ASD.  He is not maybe or what if.  He is not a Brat that needs to be spanked.  He is my little boy.  He is N-Zilla my Loveable and Destructive (non-test) Human Being.

N-Zilla my loveable and destructive son is not a spectrum test. Part 1

First let me start this post off by saying I think Santa Rosa Hospital in Down Town San Antonio is great.  We frequent there.  With four kids and what not.  I'm surprised we don't have our own wing.  

On average each kid has two E.R visits per year.  Soooo....out of twelve months I'm there like eight times.  And that is a slow year.  

Again my experiance with this hospital and staff have overall been loving and caring and great.  This post is more about people.  Not the Hospital.

I know you get it now...I love Santa Rosa.

A few weeks ago I picked up N-Zilla from the M.I.L's after work.  She had been picking him up from the bus while I was at work.  (And for that Lady Silva, I am great full.  This 30on mom needs to work and you have helped.).  When I got there, M.I.L told me that N-Zilla my little Loveable and Destructive son had had his left hand in a fist for the past 4 hours.  He wouldn't open it to drink out of his sippy cup or play with his cars.  He wouldn't even open it up for F.I.L, Which N-Zilla adores.  His hand looked swollen.  

I asked N-Zilla what happened.  The usually mommy questions

1. Did you fall down?

2. Did something bite you?

3. Did somebody hurt you?

4. You want Candy? K, open your hand and I will give you candy.

5. You want Thomas the Train? Open your and hand and I will give it to you.

Of course days of all days this is would be a day that N-Zilla did not like to make eye contact.  Not to mention...although his verbal skills are freak'n awesome, he's just not able to carry a conversation of "what happened" yet. 

Now, I am not the strongest person but I have been able to pry open a hand or two to remove dangerous or  chocking items from kids hands.

This time no luck.  It was like N-Zilla's hand was cement shut.  And every time I tried opening his hand he screamed his little Zilla lungs out.

Phone call to a fellow Suburban Homie to ask for babysitting for The Lilith (aka The Baby).  Off to the E.R we went.  Phone call to N-Zilla's teacher to ask if anything happened at school.  Phone call to bus dispatch to see if anything happened on the bus. Nope and Nope.

Great.  I was thinking how was I going to explain this at the E.R.  "My son's hand won't open. Fix it."

This is where I write what this post is really  about.

I was getting weird looks from the nurses because N-Zilla was not responding to any of their questions.  He wasn't making eye contact.  And he was covering his ears.  Reluctantly I had to tell them that N-Zilla is in the Autistic Spectrum.  Reluctantly, because often times I am confused and mostly just focused on raising my SON.

"Oooooooh, I see".  I am starting to find a complex with this sentence from perfect strangers.  

Now we come to the part when people. Not close family and friends, but people.  Just people.  Want to "see" what part of the spectrum he is on.  

To be continued because The Lilith woke up and I have to lay down with her...  So here is a pic to hold you over until the next post.

N-Zilla...My Loveable and Destructive 3 year tips to survive a BBQ

My Little N-Zilla.  The other day we were at a family bbq.  Actually, it was the first time N-Zilla and the rest of us visiting this relatives house.  I wasn't really worried how N-Zilla would act.  I wasn't worried at all.  I was busy running around the house looking for that lost sock and yelling directions to the kids.

Side Note:  I think from now on I am going to bust into song when ever I have to yell at the kids.  It worked for Mary Poppins and Maria from The Sound Of Music.  Oddly, they are the same person.

At the BBQ  I noticed a few new things that N-Zilla does when over whelmed.  I didn't realize he was overwhelmed untill I took a seat and watched him.  The house was loud.  Laughing. Music. Talking. Babies.

N-Zilla makes this noise like a faint train horn.  Mostly he makes it when he is in a loud environment.  It stays the same and constant.  But when he has at his breaking point it gets louder.  My little Loveable and Destructive 3 year old had had enough.  He was walking around flicking his ears and making the train sound.
(The flicking of the ears is new).

Of course I forgot his weighted blanket.  His life is pretty routine at home their really is no need for it except to relax and watch t.v.  Luckily he was happy that house had a couch had big heavy pillows.  He stayed for awhile  underneath the pillows.

The rest of the time he hung out at the bottom of the staircase playing with his cars.  It was getting tricky until someone put X-Box Connect dance game on.  N-Zilla zoned in on the dance moves.  (So family and friends for Christmas or Birthday's N-Zilla really digs dancing games for the Wii).

Oh my N-Zilla.  Of course God would give me a child that lives of off routine when I like to try new thing and often fall behind schedule.

N-Zilla's Tips to Survive a BBQ:

1. Always remind mom to bring weighted blanket or make the weighted vest already.  Mom!
2. Make sure host has plenty of bread rolls.
3. Find the nearest pillow and take a breather.
4. Go for walk with mom.  (I forgot to mention we take lots of walks when we are somewhere new)
5. Hang out with Grandpa.
6. Always have Sensory Diet handy so you can relax at the bottom of the stair case.
7. When Just Dance comes on...Just dance.

And that my friends is N-Zilla's Tips for surviving a BBQ

Revisiting the Blog and feeling Thankful

I haven't really had time to sit down and pour my heart out here on N-Zilla my Loveable and Destructive 3 year old.  However, there are some things that I have to retract.  Like when I said it was Safe To Have The T.V down, It's not.  Not to long ago it went back on the wall.

N-Zilla...Loveable and Destructive  was my very first post here (I must have a bit of nostalgia tonight).  I still feel like I am going through all of "this" alone.  Sometimes.

Since N-Zilla...Loveable and Destructive, I have been able to get my fears and ramblings on paper (computer)
which gives me a clear head when dealing with "real life" situations and decisions when dealing with N-Zilla.

I thank this blog for bringing Mr.S (N-Zilla's dad aka my husband) more into the light with N-Zilla, Sensory Processing Disorder and the Autism Spectrum.

 We have had such a great few months, almost afraid to blog about the past few weeks with N-Zilla. ( I am afraid we are taking a step back).

I am also thankful for this blog for bringing me closer to my family and friends and letting them in my life a little when it comes to N-Zilla.  I have had so much understanding.  N-Zilla's God Mother and B.A Martin have been freak'n awesome.

So maybe I am not so alone in this thing after all.

C'mon Mom Get The Led Out.

I actually do not know what has gotten in to me because there has been plenty to blog about when it comes to my N-Zilla.  Yes, he still is Loveable and Destructive. And yes, we still have our bouts of insomnia.  Not as much as before...maybe once or twice a week.

There has been bus rides, home work and a visit to B.A Martins house AND no cats where harmed!  This might seem like useless mundane yada yada yada's to you...but for us, for my N-Zilla it's huge.

Seriously (yikes I said it again), having N-Zilla being baby sat out side his comfort zone was a pretty big deal.  Of course I was a nervous wreck at the movies.  I totally trust B.A Martin. but I was having visions of the cats hanging from the ceiling fan and all those pretty decorations on the shelves would be broken into tiny little pieces.  I would walk in the apartment with B.A Martin and company ducking for cover in the corner while N-Zilla screamed for Thomas.

Of course non of this happened.

N-Zilla and the Family

N-Zilla my Loveable and Destructive 3 yr old had family visit this week.  Grandma and Grandpa Big Bear and Nina and Nino ( and family).  They traveled from GA and CA and we had a great time in TX.

In case you are wondering if my N-Zilla destroyed anything this week...he did.  While staying at the time share he managed to pull down the thing that opens and closes the curtains.  He was able to take the sliding glass closet door go off it's track and nameless amounts of water, juice, milk, (and beer) were spilled on the rug.  I was able to fix the curtain, someone fixed the closet and all's well that end's well.

I love when N-Zilla (and the rest of my children) get to spend time with family.   As you have put together, we live in Texas and the Fam lives out of state.  It's rare that we get to see each other.

But...I get a little sad when they leave.  Of course I get home sick.  That's a given.  However, I know that it's not forever.  I get to call, email, txt and the communicate through the infamous Face Book.   N-Zilla can't.  I wonder how much he understands that they are family and we will always see them again.

For the most part N-Zilla's comprehension and communication skills are freak'n AWESOME.  Pre-K has done wonders.  Not only does he talk more, he understands, and has become affectionate.

This morning he started crying because he thought we were going to she Grandma Big Bear and Cousin.  I told him they went home and we would see them later.  He just stared at me and asked for Thomas.  That was fine...then later in the day Crazy Horse came home from school and N-Zilla ran to the front room yelling "Gramma".

Waaaaaaaaaaa!

An ode to Pre-K

N-Zilla's very first open house! It went good.  For the most part.  I'm not counting him running back stage while the principle was talking. And the shake-of-the-head from fellow pre-k parent.  Ya, N-Zilla could not sit still while pre-k teachers where talking to us parents.  So, Ronny from Jersey Shore decided to stair at me while saying oh my God under his breath.  After that everything was good.

I saw his class room.  Of course he went straight to the trains. I saw his name on the rug and right next to it was a yellow chair.  I had a feeling that the chair was for him.  I was right.  But, it was ok.  I'm glad his teacher is working with him not against him.  She also has high expectations for him.  This is good, we have had the opposite experience when N-Zilla was in day care.

The reason for the yellow chair...it gives N-Zilla the space he needs while being apart of circle time.  I asked his teacher if he was sitting long enough for circle time.  She said he is sitting for the most part and but not engaging quit yet.  I'm so happy that his teachers don't just let him wonder the class room so he doesn't "disturb" circle time.  He sits for one circle full circle time (the class has three).  Second circle time, he gets to go to the bath room early.  Third circle time...he walks around.

I really am happy that N-Zilla is in school.  I do feel that he has teachers that are on his team.  I see how interactive the teacher is with all the kids.  Going to open house tonight was a weight lifted off my shoulders.  I got to ask questions and get answers.  Not once did I get the run around and no one was underestimating or overestimating my Loveable and Destructive guy.

Someday when I get a camera I will show you some more of our Loveable and Destructive world.   In the meantime school is one the best things that could have happened for N-Zilla.